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Date: Feb 24, 2008, 18:15:06
Category: Literature -> Poetry -> Human Nature
Stars: 2
Favourites: 4
Tools used: thoughts
Time taken: a few minutes
Views: 39 (Full: 15)
Shooting Star

Description:

I had the privilege of a moment
purest chance during a breath of smoke
to see a shooting star
fine example of the true wonder
of the firmament

Not an act of some non-existent "god"
a series of thoughts I find beyond odd

But a flash of light
a death that transpired
thousands of years ago
--light years--
that I was given space in time
to see...all this time later
and not to make a wish
for a dream I won't acquire

beyond my own hands

set me to ponder
on all those things
that people

in the church (pick any belief)
in politics (pick any country)


believe in their scope and authority
to proselytize
to demonize
to try to make me realize
based on things that aren't real
beyond their own self-stated wisened eyes

I mean no disrespect
but who are any one of *you*
to tell anyone else

who they can sleep with
who they can love
what they can
(or can't)
do with their own bodies
or dictate a belief
lest they go to hell

or that *our* beliefs
are right
and *theirs*
are wrong

how dare any of *you* here
presume to speak for me

I have my own voice
can use it if I *choose*
and what I *choose* to do here
is suggest you go outside
one dark night

When it's too dark to see
the color of your skin,
so you can't judge another's
and simply try
look at the sky

call it prayer
or meditation
or reflection
or whatever you choose

and watch, silently.

If you see a shooting star
enjoy it for its own sake
...if you must call it a miracle
or some wonder from afar
beyond the natural realm
then by all means partake
in your *own* heart and mind...

...but leave it there
and don't sanctimoniously try
to define it for mine.


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I wonder what triggered this.

There's a lot of truth there, and written quite eloquently. There's a subtle rhyme that adds power to the words.
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Many different things. I just get tired of intolerance and unnecessary judgment of others who presume their way is the *only* way.

Thank you.
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I agree with you here, I like totally concur
And now this is out of your system, can you lay off the WBC for a minute?
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Probably not. It'll come out of my system in its own time...but if you'd like, I won't say another word of it to you.
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Oh, I didn't mean it like that, I know that this topic stirs something deep inside of you and you can always use me as your sounding board
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No worries. I'm used to it. Already shut up about it, babe.
*nuggle*
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I most certainly will not *pouts*
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I didn't mean you. *smirk*
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Then who?
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I already shut up about it, just in case you didn't notice.
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*sigh* (<-- we still need that emote!)
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The power of the pen at it's finest! great work!
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Thank you *so* much.
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A message that applies to EVERYONE.
So many words here, are the same exact I speak myself.
Tolerance is lacking in this world, along with respect and understanding.

Thank you, for writing the words many have thought themselves, thank you for expressing what many need to hear, and thank you, for standing up in what you believe, whether others believe it or not.
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Thank you so much. Too many people could learn to live and let live. People won't always agree...in fact, people as a rule, will rarely agree...and that's okay. We're *each and every one* allowed to believe what we will.

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"We're *each and every one* allowed to believe what we will."
And this is what makes the world a place of beauty, I do agree with full heartedly, and While I know now that politics we differ, life and its understanding we share much.
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Interesting statement. I think it could do with a bit of tightening. It would have more emotional impact with fewer words.
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Thanks. You're probably correct...I wrote it directly into the text box in the moment as it came to the surface. I'll look at revision later when it's not so current in my head. Any suggestions on which words to delete?
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Hmm. I think I'll leave that to you (retreating hurriedly).
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Awww...believe me, I take constructive suggestions seriously, and without *any* offense. I may or may not use suggestions, but I always try to consider them.
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It's one thing to point out problems of (say) diction. It's another to presume to rewrite someone else's poem; I certainly don't want to do the latter.
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Ah, I see. In re-reading, I see no unintential grammar issues - but I'm also not quite at the stage of revision (and one of the big things I do during revision is delete extraneous words ).

Oh, there's another matter I'll be wanting to get your thoughts on soonish, but I'm not *quite* there yet. Just a headsup that you'll probably receive a rather random email from me during the coming weeks...
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...I like it.
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Mucho grabass...

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The reason for the fav (now that my brain has warmed up to the point that I'm able to connect more than two words in my ever-failing brain)...

I can relate to this.  There are many, many times (albeit in different situations...since I'm not going to be outside puffing away like a chimney on a Pittsburgh night) that I've felt and thought in similar ways.  

Religion is something personal to me.  Yes, I was born and raised Roman Catholic, and I still hold some of the core tenets "sacred"...but I don't believe they have the right to tell me what to think, who to see, what to believe.  I can't see how limiting myself, as they want me to do, can open me up to something greater.

I can relate to what you've said.  That's why I've faved it.  I...understand.
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Of course...and you & I have discussed this before. My biggest assertion to many christians has been that - if god is the final judgment, then we are *each* individually accountable for ourselves - and *only* for ourselves.

Like I said...mucho grabass. Or grassyass...or what have you. Mercy Buckets...all that good shit. I appreciate the fav in the spirit it's given - and in whatever way I have fun dicking with language...thank you...
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very nice, a great message, it is so easy for us to slip into trying to inflict our own ideas on others, it's always great to be reminded not to. i think we all need that.
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Fan-tas-tic.

Your words are beautifully chosen, and the meaning behind them is as solid as stone. The scattering of rhymes is delightful, because it's almost like a meteor shower in itself. Fledgist has a point about the length... but the length didn't actually jarr at all, because the meaning was so well-sustained.

You sum up a sentiment I've been trying to put in words for *years*.

"I appreciate this - you appreciate this - now let's both appreciate it on our OWN terms".
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Thank you! And doubly so for the fav.

I'm still pondering this one, and just where to tighten the verse. Still, I am grateful that its meaning is understood.

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